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We like to set up a routine and we enjoy the rhythm of keeping to it for the duration of the holiday. There were unknowns this year, though. What if the older one was just too grown up to tolerate a kids' club?

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What if the younger one refused to go without her? What if this was the first year we'd hear complaints of boredom? What if we no longer got a minute's break from them? The last element, has always been successful for everyone on previous TUI holidays, but with these pesky ever-changing children, you just never know.

The love of a routine remained in place, however. Both nippers continued to be enamoured of the offered buffets, with the younger one now keen to select for herself and the older one suddenly interested in trying many things she'd never eaten before.

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After breakfast, the rhythm went, we hit the swimming pool. After day one, the girls made it clear that the family pool was the place for morning fun and made friends speedily, with whom they splashed for hours daily. In the afternoons, lunch eaten, the innocents would take to the kids' club. My fears that the older one would be too mature for the club were replaced with an awareness that what's coming down the tracks is the teenage conviction that life is only worth living when you are with your peers. And the younger one still follows where the older leads, so off they went each day, leaving us two hours of adult time.

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We drank coffees and, OK, maybe there was a beer a couple of afternoons, and I ran a couple of times along the promenade, but the habit we formed on this holiday was a taking of the waters. Having been to the area before, we knew we liked the rock swimming pools and dipped in them several times. There is great pleasure to be had in watching the waves crash outside the semi-protected pools and in bobbing around, looking ashore to Mount Teide in the distance.

We also discovered the Alcala harbour this time, where English, German and Scandinavian older people gather on blankets and towels and the low stone wall, relaxing, sunning themselves and intermittently going down the stone steps into the sea. After two or three days, the regulars started acknowledging us on arrival, chatting about sea temperature, and, in some cases, semi-gloating about how they spend two or three months of their retirement winters out there, getting warmth in their bones and living well on their pensions.

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We happily took in the information and then headed back to the haven of the Sensatori Resort Tenerife, where we swapped our seawater-wet towels for fluffy fresh ones, fetched our children, had an ice cream at the poolside bar and decided which way the pre-dinner evening was going. On our previous visit to this hotel, the pre-dinner evening went only one way, and that was to the pirate pool, with its shallow water, themed waterslides and complete safety-plus-thrills for small children.

We went twice this year. They did the slides happily, but mostly enjoyed helping smaller kids to enjoy them. They were the big girls and so, after a couple of evenings there, we found ourselves by the huge, seawater-filled pool on the sea-side of the hotel. This pool runs almost the full length of the hotel, but in a languorous, meandering shape, with grassy banks and little nooks where you can tuck in and relax.

When we would arrive there in the evening, for the last of the sun, only a few others remained reclining, and there was always some little zone where we could set up and feel like we had a poolside garden all to ourselves. The older one could attempt a full length with her dad; the smaller one could navigate herself to the nearest mid-pool island where she and I would bob before leaving the other pair at it. There was a strong sense on those evenings, probably exaggerated by that been-to-the-beach quiet buzz, that we were experiencing a change of gear as a family, but that there was nothing to fear from it.

A pre-dinner drink on the Ibiza-like terrace, watching the sun go down, was certainly not the high-alert experience of holidays gone by. The chill-out music, the Campari in hand, the kids meeting their friends, it felt like the place to be. As well as the buffet, we also dined at Club Ocean, which is chic Italian but still family-friendly, and at Nami Asian Bistro. The latter was the older daughter's choice, her birthday having fallen the day before we took off.

The birthday surprise was the arrival of her London uncle and cousin-godfather, who were staying at a nearby hotel. The Londoners and the Dubliners approved of the sushi and noodles.

Everything changes without us noticing when we're at home and going through the routine of school and work and all the rest. It's only when you step away and step away into somewhere that gives your head a little peace, that you see how everything has altered. You certainly discern that you're finally in the semi-lie-in zone and that you're not needed in the pool every minute, but it's also about actually having proper chats with these emerging people that are your kids, about seeing how they navigate a strange place and new people and different situations.

Indeed, to invoke Abba, they are slipping through your fingers all the time.

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But on a good holiday, that takes on a rosy glow. Aine Fox Airline flybmi has suspended flights and is filing for administration, blaming uncertainty around Brexit. Jillian Bolger There's a best time to visit any honeymoon destination Take a mini-moon now, and a long-haul trip later, Jillian Bolger says. Sarah Caden June 11 2: The Sensatori Resort in Tenerife is a haven, every inch an oasis of leisure and luxury.

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